I just read a story from BS's heartbreaking essay competition. Its by a 12 year old child and before i checked out her profile, i thought she was around my age due to her idea for the story
Basically, its about Anna who took drugs. One day, the teachers conduct a spot check during assembly and she wrapped her packet of drugs in a piece of paper before throwing backwards. Unfortunately, her best friend (Eve) thought there was a thumb drive wrapped inside the paper and took it. And of course she got caught.
Eve refused to plea guilty and while she's detained in the police station, she called Anna a few times. And the story goes on describing how remorse Anna feels. In the end, Eve left a call message for Anna saying how the court doesnt believes her and she had committed suicide. After reading, Anna took a scissors and stabbed into her arm (!!) and died in the end.
3000+ words... I literally gasped when i read the last paragraph. The ending wasnt what i expected it to be.
I missed my writing talent. I used to be have wonderful ideas flowing out of my mind continuously. I used to be able to write beautiful stories. I used to be good in writing. But when i started secondary school, its like my writing skills are all gone, all gone...
Now, my ideas are not original at all. My endings are so predictable. My composition sucks. I miss writing. I miss getting A's for my compositions. Now that my i have no more talent in writing, im not accomplished in anything. Writing is what im good at. But because its all lost, im not good in anything, anymore.
I just wish that i can write beautiful essays once again. Writing is my only thing, i cant just let it go like that...
When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
- From Fix You by Coldplay
Im trying my best right now. Everyday, i would do my homework without fail. I chiong all my studies. I love that surge of accomplishment which i hadnt felt for a very long time. But at the same time, i feel tired. Its like im addicted to homework. Im addicted to accomplish things as fast and efficient as possible. Im addicted to see people look at me work and be dazed. All because i havent felt so accomplished for a long time. Its like im desperate for people to be looking up to me. Thinking how great i am. Thinking how good it is be to be me.But, im really tired. I was never a person who likes to keep competing. I like friendly competitions but only on rare occasions. Like when i need motivation or something.
On a lighter note,
Happy Birthday Ang Sing Yee!!
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(='.'=) This is a bunny. Say hi to it :DDD
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